Choices in Life

Life choices such as to lie or to tell the truth, to live or to die, to be loyal or to betray, are all difficult choices that we are bound to face sooner or later in our lives. As a teenager, at this stage of growing up, the two most difficult options to choose between is whether one should be assimilated or to show one’s uniqueness or true personality. As our society has evolved, it has changed some of the values and perspectives of what teenagers should do or be; and a huge part of it is making the decision to choose to fit in or to express who you truly are. The complexity behind making these choices derives from the risk that is involved in the decision making. One could be extremely successful if you chose to live your life in pursuit of expressing your personality, yet you could end up being mocked and ridiculed; but you could still live the ideal life even by conforming to the norms of our society, although you could live without taking full control over your lives. Deciding whether to express yourself or to conform to the ideals of the people around you is the most difficult choice to make, since it may affect your actions, your confidence, and your values for the rest of your lives.

“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.” The famous playwright Raymond Hull made it clear to the world what he chose to live his life by. He proved to the world that living by this ideal is nonetheless the right choice by having successful careers as a television screenwriter, a lecturer, and the author of numerous non-fiction novels. Another well-known and successful icon, Lady Gaga, also explained in an interview about how she was thought to be too provocative during her school years. She toned it down at that time, but later in life she discovered that this diversity is what led her to her accomplishments today. Herbert Aptheker, born in the year of 1915, was a Civil Rights Activist who belonged to an extremely wealthy family in Brooklyn. Even when growing up in a racist environment, when peonage was enforced in many states in the US, he chose to draw himself away from the prejudiced thinking. Rather than being assimilated along with his four brothers and sisters, he joined William L. Patterson, a lawyer who gave up law and became the leader of the Communist Party. They later formed the “Abolish Peonage Committee”, and managed to rescue many black women from a brothel in Georgia and move them to Chicago and New Orleans. Therefore, people who choose to express their true intentions and personalities often are able to accomplish and fulfill their dreams or goals, but the process will be difficult and may not always end up successful. While Lady Gaga was experimenting with music performances that involved provocativeness and drugs, her parents wouldn’t look at her for months. During the process, she also experienced intense depression when being dropped by her record labels a couple of times. Herbert Aptheker also didn’t have such a smooth process while fighting for Civil Rights. He didn’t have the chance to start a family, or even stay in the same place for a week; he was rejected and brusquely pushed aside by many black men and women who didn’t accept what he was doing, as well as people who were not thankful for what he was throwing his entire life into doing. Even by putting all his effort and time into setting the Civil Rights into action, he wasn’t able to change the fact that many black people were still treated badly. Though it had been hard times he had been through, he managed to leave a true mark in challenging racism. Expressing your true self gives you a chance to experience a process that is worthwhile of your time and effort. The results may not always end up how you want it to be, or what you expected it to be, but the knowledge you or others have about how much contribution you have made for your dream is permanent.

On the other hand, if rather than expressing yourself you choose to fit in and go along with the people around you, you enter through a completely different door than when trying to express yourself. By trying to fit in, you are hiding the most important part of you, the part of you that is irreplaceable, the part of you that is most precious to this world. If Lady Gaga were to tone down and hide her provocativeness forever, would she be able to achieve and stand in the position she is at now? Bernard-Henri Levy has written for Newsweek many times speaking up for disadvantaged people who are trying to live in the dangerous environments of the war in Syria. If he stops writing, intervening, or talking against the bloodstained killing process in Syria, and just goes along with the French and Chinese government who are backing this war, would the consciousness of people around the world to stop killing in Syria be aroused? Nonetheless, even if he chose not to live his life without fighting for these people in Syria, he would still live well off without the critics constantly assessing his interpretations as biased, reckless, and without merit. People can live their life with their uniqueness buried inside and still be well off, but that would be living without reaching their potential.

In all of the hair-pulling decisions you could face in your lives, I strongly believe that the choice between choosing to fit in or to express your originality is the most difficult to make. In both situations, you could either receive precious opportunities or lose priceless chances. You can pick a fruit that is unchanged and help it grow, or you could tinkle with its DNA, modify it, experiment with it, and make it bigger and juicier. It may be unsuccessful, but when it does work out, the results may be more appealing. It is up to yourself to decide whether you would like to live a life that is safe and typical, or to live one that may be challenging and unpredictable that could lead you to living your dreams.